My approach with dogs is all about leadership. Lots of folks hear me say “leadership” and they assume I mean “dominance”. It is SO important to clear this up, so let’s do that now in the clearest way I know how: a chart!
The difference isn't always visible on the outside, but it is something that you the dog owner can definitely feel. See if you can feel the difference between these two approaches.
LEADERSHIP | DOMINANCE |
we-focused | me-focused |
values group harmony | values personal status in pack |
open-hearted | closed-hearted |
warm, light-hearted | cool, aloof |
firm | forceful |
open to the moment | agenda- or goal-oriented |
fosters confidence in dog | erodes confidence in dog |
clear | confusing |
calm | frustrated |
fair for everyone | unfair bias to self |
patiently play the long game | impatiently want instant results |
consistent | yo-yos with ingratiation, to regain favour |
predictable | unpredictable |
feels safe to be around | feels unsafe to be around |
has willing followers | has subjects |
disciplines | punishes |
success is attributed to the group | takes credit for success |
takes responsibility for short-comings | blames dog for short-comings |
No one is perfect. Sometimes, you’ll notice a dominant streak in you. It’s ok. Simply being aware of it is a huge step. Next, chuckle at yourself and your dominant streak; don’t be too serious or critical of yourself and don’t try to dominate yourself!
Do you want to move from dominance towards leadership in a way that your dog understands? Work with me to discover EXACTLY how to do that.
Here's to You and Your Dog!
Elaine
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